I've noticed lately some people close to me are really struggling.
1) They want to make a change and it isn't happening fast enough,
2) They want to make a change and can't even start,
3) They've made a change and there are still problems and that feels even more discouraging, or
4) Something painful has happened and it's just hard to deal with.
I have a heart for anyone who struggles, because I feel like so much of my own life has involved struggling. I want to rescue people, but usually I don't have the resources or the single right thing to say to "Kazaam" fix it.
I notice when someone is empathizing with another person, they may say "The struggle is real." I was thinking about that saying today and wanting to share what has helped me move through my own struggles.
When I struggle, it helps me to feel a little dramatic inside. I am not just struggling with whatever I am struggling with. I am struggling on behalf of others. I use what I am struggling with to identify with other women, artists, animal lovers, creatives, mothers, daughters... On this planet at any given time, there is someone not as well off as you. You are in a revolution and the fight is not only for you, but also for others because your happiness and transformation journey will change the world!
E- Empty your mind
Nothing creates "snow globe mind" more than struggle. You're having a hard time and you want to feel better and get movement going and figure it out and all that thinking - thinking - thinking is like shaking up a snow globe. If you want to improve how you struggle, practice emptying your mind. If you're in high alert and feeling distressed, this can be super hard. But I know you can do it. Just fix some tea and sit looking at it steep. Or go outside and hug a tree. Or call a positive friend and talk about something happy. Paint a picture. If you can meditate, that's great. But it's often hard to do this in a struggle. You can, however, at least begin quieting your mind. Please try this!
A- Ask for help
Ask for something, anything. Maybe you don't know anyone who can solve your problem for you. But you can still ask someone for something to help you feel better. Reach out, and you can even say "I'm asking for help, but I don't even know what to ask for." Be thoughtful in who you ask for what and use your intuition because I know you have it. Ask the right people for the right things. Someday, someone will ask for your help... and you will help them. Heck, you've probably already helped lots of people and have some extra credit to spend. If you don't have a safe person to ask, ask me and I will try to offer something meaningful to help you.
L- Let Go
Let go of things that don't matter, and focus. One of the best things I've learned when I am really and truly going through a painful transition or time is to prioritize. Nothing clears out crap like a true struggle. You can't hang on to things that don't matter, because there's no time for that. You need to dig in and become clear. There is a way through whatever you are going through. I just know this is so. But it becomes easier when you become clear about the basics and what you need to feel happy and you make choices that line up with that.
R - Revolution > E - Empty Your Mind > A - Ask for help > L - Let go... unfortunately, there is no single formula, 4 step plan, easy peasy thing to do to get through a deep struggle. But all great hero and heroine stories involve great struggles, don't they?
If you are in a struggle now, I understand it's real. Remember, you were made to get through this and you will :)
Photos (top to bottom)
R- Revolution: "Being happy is how I change the world "... never give up on this idea. Your happiness is your purpose. That involves being treated well and doing things you love. It involves transforming your pain (eventually) into something of meaning.
E - Empty Your Mind: I loved this tea presentation while recently on vacation. Having tea presented so thoughtfully reminded me of what a ceremony and practice drinking tea can be. Use this, or something like this, as your practice to slow down and empty your mind.
A - Ask for help: I use and re-use this photo of me a lot because it speaks volumes. Admittedly, I have often reached out for help too much historically. But many people, maybe you, struggle with asking for help. You may feel like you're a burden, you're embarrassed, you don't even know what to ask for. Get over it and ask for something!
L- Let go: I've always loved rocks and shells with holes in them. They remind me of this Rumi quote: "When he closes off every passageway and escape route, it's to show you a secret way which no one knows." No matter what, remember there is a way through whatever you're going through.